THE PUPPET MASTER

If the Lord is the Puppet Master then I will be his puppet. He will pull the strings and make me dance and sing his songs and control my every move. I will sing the words he puts in my mouth. For it is he whom made me and he chose the wood that he carved my body from. He placed the strings on my hands and legs to perform for him. It is in the comfort of these strings I feel safe and secure. One day I will be a real boy(girl) with the freedom from these strings that day being when God knows I can stand on my own and when I can sing and dance with him in his loving arms . He will never leave me but will only guide me and I will no longer need the strings I will know the dance and the song. We will be together and enhance each other through love.

If you believe that you are giving up your freedom by letting God be in control then remember the nights without him. The nights of alcohol and drugs the lies , the deceit, the sex, all that great fun. The day after hugging the potty seat and the roaring headache that feels like half your head was blown off the night before. Oh what great fun that was and there you were alone, alone and alone. The truth is God was there with you yet you were to ashamed to even lift your eyes to him. How many times did you swear that you would never ever do this again. Yet again as soon as the pain went away you were right back out there trying to have another great day of sickness, shame and pure disgust. The whole time God sat waiting on you to just lift up your eyes and say one word "help".

He would then attach the strings with your permission and oil the joints slowly and begin to move you. It's not easy and he would never say this is going to be easy but he will lay out the road one stone at a time and move you slowly on to the path. Every once in a while a stone won't support your weight but God will place another one just in reach and see if you are still on the path. He will teach you the song and the dance. He will control you at first but one day he will pull out the scissors and cut the strings. If fear creeps in then open your eyes and take the hand extended to you and dance with your lord in the security of his arms to the music of life.

What I learned in my study of Exodus

The bible talks about the people leaving Egypt. We have always heard the miracle of the departing sea and never really thought much about any thing else. While discussing the Exodus with my children it hit me that there was more to the story than a miracle. The lesson is that whenever God performs a miracle like freeing the people from Egypt we rejoice and sing praises to him but as soon when our memory grows faint of the miracles and we find ourselves against the sea and the enemy advancing we start to complain. We begin to proclaim that it's not worth the effort and we would be better off to submit than to keep our faith. The devil's tool is to make it very apparent what we don't have and blinds us to what we do have. If we remove the blinders we would see that we have everything we need not everything we want. God hears our calls for things we want but as the people in the desert proved we suddenly let our desires overtake us and hoard up God's blessings and rationalize why it's OK. God cares about our wants but if it doesn't serve his purpose all the complaining in the world will not bring it about. If you are being rewarded with riches and life is not even a challenge then you better step back and take a look at your life because you may not be serving God but the Devil.

THE TEN COMMANDMENTS REMOVAL FROM COURTHOUSES

Having the Ten commandments removed from courthouse walls, who came up with that idea? The Ten Commandments say what? How dare us ask the world to read God's word. After all he asked such impossible feats. What was it he asked us to do?

• How dare him ask us not to kill, lie and steal. Isn't it our God given right to do these things.
• Shouldn't we all be able to covet our neighbor's processions heck , even steal them if we won't to.
• We should be able to hate our neighbor just because he has worked harder than us and achieved more processions.
• We should all be sleeping with each other's spouse. We should be spreading venereal diseases to everyone.
• We should all have the right to carry guns and murder whom ever we please.
• We should be able to let our teens have sex whenever they want and they should be able to kill the fetus just because they don't want to be bothered with raising a child.
• We should all be able to do drugs and drink alcohol and lay in a drunken stupor ain't that what life's all about.
• We should all not work, be afraid to go outside for fear of our neighbors, stay wasted so we can hide the fact that we are all cowards and the world is such a hell for us all.

Did you say hell for us all ? Wasn't that what the ten commandments were all about avoiding all the above and maybe avoiding hell on earth. How can having ten little rules hanging on a wall to remind us what we should all be doing to make our life better be so intimidating to someone.

DEPRESSION MEET YOUR MATCH

As I sit here alone staring at the sky,
I really don't exactly know why,
My brain is flying up and down,
sometimes kicking off the ground.

No form to my way of thinking
No sense as my emotions keep sinking,
Depression has took hold of my mind,
My flight plan has took no path of any kind.

Collisions happening all around,
destruction in my path abound.
Sadness,nothingness,empty as can be,
No future, no hope, can I see.

My soul keeps crying out, you see
For only my Bible can save me,
So Bible hurry take me away,
Help me to make it one more day.

IDEAS ON HE BOOK OF JUBLEES

I RESERVED THIS SPACE TO DISCUSS IDEAS ON THE FALLEN ANGELS AND THE BOOK OF JUBLEES. I AM VERY INTERESTED IN YOUR OPINION.

HANDING PROBLEMS TO GOD

I WAS THINKING ABOUT HOW DIFFERENT I AM TO MY GRAND CHILDREN THAN I WAS TO MY SONS. I DON'T PUNISH THE SAME AND OVERLOOK QUITE A BIT MORE. I AM MORE PATIENT AND MORE DEDICATED TO CHRISTIAN VALUES. I WAS WONDERING WHAT THE DIFFERENCE IS.





THINKING ABOUT THE OLD TESTAMENT AND HOW GOD WAS SO DIFFERENT THEN. HE HAD TO TEACH DRASTIC LESSONS AND LISTEN TO THE CONSTANT COMPLAINING OF HIS PEOPLE. GOD IS SO DIFFERENT NOW AND EVEN THOUGH HE STILL TEACHES LESSONS HE SEEMS MORE PATIENT AND UNDERSTANDING ABOUT HIS CREATION. ALL THIS BECAUSE OF HIS SON JESUS CHRIST. ARE WE THE GRAND KIDS OF GOD? HE DISCIPLINES US LESS BECAUSE OF HIS SON WHO PAID THE PRICE FOR OUR SIN.



I WAS DIFFERENT AS A PARENT I EXPECTED PERFECTION AND THERE WAS A PRICE TO PAY FOR DISOBEDIENCE. OF COURSE I NEVER GOT PERFECTION ALL I GOT WAS A LOT OF FAILURES IN MY MARRIAGE ,IN MY PARENTING, AND IN MY FINANCES. I FELT LIKE A FLOP AND JUST WANTED TO HIDE SOMEWHERE SO I DIDN'T HAVE TO FACE THE REAL ME.







THINKING BACK I KNOW WHAT THE DIFFERENCE IS. I WAS SO WRAPPED UP IN FINDING MY HAPPINESS I COULDN'T SEE WHAT GOD HAD PLACED RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. I WAS SO MISERABLE THAT I MADE MY CHILDREN'S LIFE MISERABLE ALSO. I LOVED THEM WITH ALL MY HEART BUT I FELT I WAS MISSING SOMETHING AND YES I PROBABLY BLAMED MY CHILDREN BECAUSE ALL THE FUN WAS GONE IN MY LIFE. I SPENT ENDLESS DAYS TRYING TO FIND A BABY SITTER JUST S I COULD WREAK MY LIFE SOME MORE. I ALSO WAS FULL OF GUILT FOR MY FAILURES THAT I KNOW I SEWED THAT IN MY SON'S LIFE. I THOUGHT GOD HAD TURNED HIS FACE FROM ME AND I WAS PAYING THE PRICE TAG.







YEARS LATER AFTER LOSING A SON AND GAINING MY GRAND CHILDREN TO RAISE I BEGAN TO NOTICE I WAS DIFFERENT. GOD WAS BACK, THE PROBLEMS WERE STILL THERE BUT I DIDN'T FEEL THE SAME. I HAD CAME TO REALIZE THAT EVERYTHING I NEED FOR HAPPINESS WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME . NOTHING IS AS GREAT AS A PAIR OF LITTLE ARMS GIVING YOU A HUG EVERY MORNING. SEEING THE SMILES ON EACH OF MY GRAND CHILDREN'S FACES AS THEY EXCEL THROUGH LIFE. TEACHING THEM ABOUT GOD AND HOPING THAT WHEN THE TIME COMES THAT THE LORD WILL HOLD THEM CLOSE AND PROTECT THEM FROM SOME OF LIFE'S UNPREDICTABLE EVENTS.





I SUDDENLY HAD A THOUGHT ALL THE DEPRESSION AND SADNESS I WENT THROUGH ALL THAT WAS BECAUSE I WANTED TO SET MYSELF UP AS SOMETHING ABOVE ALL ELSE. I WANTED TO BE AT THE HEAD OF HE TABLE. I WANTED TO BE SOMEBODY. THE TRUTH IS : I WAS ALWAYS SOMEBODY BUT I FELT LIKE I WAS NOTHING. IT WASN'T UNTIL LATER YEARS THAT I REALIZED THAT ALL THAT PRIDE MEANT NOTHING. THE ONLY REAL MEANINGS COME FROM YOUR FAMILY. THE PAIN I FELT, AS I FELT LIKE A FAILURE AS A MOTHER YET I DID NOTHING ABOUT IT. ALL THE WASTED TEARS AND WASTED YEARS I GAVE TO SATAN. HE ROLLED ME AROUND LIKE A BALL OF YARN MY MISERY GROWING AS I ADDED THE GUILT LAYER AFTER LAYER. I CAN SEE THAT NOW BUT THE BLINDERS WERE WAY TO THICK BACK THEN.





IT WASN'T UNTIL I SET DOWN ONE DAY AND SAID "WHAT AM I DOING?" I'VE ALWAYS SAID I TRUSTED GOD YET I NEVER ONCE TURNED OVER MY LIFE TO HIM. I WAS TRYING TO FIX THINGS MYSELF ,BE IN CONTROL, BE SOMETHING I'M NOT. THE WORST EMBARRASSMENT I EVER HAD WAS TO ADMIT I CAN'T HANDLE MY LIFE AND THAT I AM A COMPLETE FAILURE AT MY ATTEMPTS. I STILL TRY TO CONTROL THINGS. IF I HAVE A PROBLEM I STILL SPEND MANY HOURS TRYING TO FIND A SOLUTION. IT IS WHEN I FINALLY GIVE UP THAT GOD SAYS "WATCH THIS" AND FIXES IT WITH THE GREATEST OF EASE.





WHEN A FRIEND WAS SUFFERING SO MUCH AND I HEARD HIM TRYING TO ANALYZE HIS PROBLEM THAT I REALIZED THAT HE WASN'T LETTING GO AND LETTING GOD TAKE CARE OF IT. HE WAS STILL PUTTING A HUMAN FACTOR IN THE EQUATION AND SADLY I KNEW GOD WAS WAITING ON HIM TO GIVE UP AND HAND IT TO HIM.





I DON'T THINK WE REALIZE THAT AS LONG A WE INTERVENE GOD WILL LET US TRY TO SOLVE THE PUZZLE. A FRIEND TOLD ME ONCE THAT GOD WAS CRUEL IF HE LET PEOPLE SUFFER SO, BUT I BELIEVE THAT IT'S A LEARNING PROCESS AND WE USUALLY WALK AWAY WITH A BETTER UNDERSTANDING OF HOW GOD WORKS. OF COURSE I DON'T JUST SET BACK AND SAY ITS YOUR PROBLEM GOD BECAUSE I AM HUMAN AND PUTTING IN THE HUMAN FACTOR IS WHAT HUMANS DO. I STILL SPEND MANY HOURS TRYING TO SOLVE EVERYTHING INCLUDING HOW THE UNIVERSE WORKS. I MAY AS WELL AIM HIGH AFTER ALL WHO KNOWS GOD MIGHT JUST ANSWER THAT PROBLEM FOR ME ONE DAY TOO.

THINKING ABOUT THE FOOT OFTHE CROSS

SINCE I WROTE MY ARTICLE THE OTHER DAY I HAVE PONDERED ON WHAT ALL THIS MEANT TO ME. WHY DID SUDDENLY OUT OF THE BLUE DID I BEGIN TO BE INTERESTED IN THE FOOT OF THE CROSS? WHAT COULD IT ALL MEAN TO ME?
WELL I MENTALLY PUT MYSELF THERE AND WHAT I SAW WAS HORRIFYING. I WONDERED HOW THIS MADE A DIFFERENCE. IT WASN'T UNTIL I LOOKED AT SOME OF THE PICTURES OF JESUS ON THE CROSS THAT SUDDENLY IT HIT ME. HOW WE TAMED DOWN THE TONE OF THIS GRUESOME ACT SO THAT IT DOESN'T INTIMIDATE US TO MUCH. I HAVE HEARD PEOPLE SPEAK ABOUT THE MOVIE THE PASSION AND HOW GHASTLY IT IS. WELL THE REAL TRUTH IS THAT MOVIE DID NOT DO JUSTICE TO THE BRUTALITY THAT JESUS ENDURED. AS UNMERCIFUL AS IT WAS JESUS ENDURED TEN FOLD THE BRUTALITY.
IT CAME TO ME THAT MAYBE IF WE HAVE TAMED DOWN THE DEATH OF CHRIST IN OUR MIND MAYBE WE ALSO HAVE MEDDLED WITH OUR PERCEPTION OF SIN. THAT WE RECREATED OUR OWN INTERPRETATION OF SIN SO THAT IT WOULDN'T SO DOMINEERING IN OUR LIVES. THAT EVERYTHING JESUS DIED FOR MAY BE CHANGED TO A TENTH OF WHAT WE PERCEIVE AS SIN. THAT WOULD MAKE US NINETY PERCENT SINNERS AND WE DON'T EVEN PERCEIVE IT. THAT IS REALLY A SCARY THOUGHT.